Proverbs 17:17, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”
I know many of us have heard the saying that friends come and friends go, sometimes they stay for only a short while, and sometimes we get to continue that relationship for many years. I’ve heard many people, from kids to teens to adults, over the years talk about how they crave friendship. How they often feel lonely and just wish they had someone to talk to. I think everyone at some point in their life will feel this way and isn’t that ironic because in your loneliness you are not alone. Sometimes, God allows us to experience feelings of loneliness so that we can learn to lean on Him. Sometimes we bring that loneliness upon ourselves when we discard potential friend matches because the person doesn’t fit our idea of what a friend should look like, sound like, act like, etc. I’ve sat at lunch tables by myself and I’ve sat at lunch tables completely surrounded by my fellow peers before and guess what? I’ve felt lonely in both instances. I remember praying for friends, ardently, petitioning God for a friendship like David and Jonathan’s. Can I tell you something? In the waiting, God was preparing me to be the friend I needed to be. He was helping me to learn what I wanted in a friend and what I needed in a friend and He was gently reminding me that I have a friend in Him.
God has blessed me over the years with quite the mod podge of friendships. My friends come from all walks of life and are in various stages of life, and I treasure each one as the gift they are. I love that we are all so different but we share a common love: Jesus. If you are looking for a friend, look around and find the person in your life whose walk with Christ you want to emulate, and then befriend that person. You might be surprised at who it is: maybe it’s your elementary school teacher, Sunday school teacher, that sweet older lady who calls you “hon” every time you walk by her, the man who plays the guitar or piano, the man who runs the sound system, music slides or livestream, maybe it’s the person sitting in the pew behind you, in front of you, across from you, maybe it’s one of the door greeters on the hospitality team whose smile makes you feel seen and welcome, maybe it’s the guy who is always cracking a dad joke, the point is: You. Have. Options. Did you know that the Bible even tells us how to make friends and how to treat our friends? Colossians 3:12-14 says, “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”
When I think of a powerful friend group or allies in the Bible, I can’t help but think of the 12 disciples. You know what is really cool about these men? Is they were just regular guys. Literally, just regular people who were willing to follow Jesus and become a part of something bigger than them. A lot of these men tell us about their flaws: they had short tempers at times, could lie with the best of them, they wrestled with doubt, fear, and anxiety, they dealt with pride, guilt, and shame just like the rest of us BUT they didn’t let their pasts, their flaws, their insecurities rule their futures. Instead, they allowed God to do a work in them and through them and because of that, God used them mightily to grow the Kingdom.
I know what you are thinking, what about Judas? Judas didn’t trust God’s timing. He wanted things done his way and because of that, it was easy for him to fall into the enemy’s hands because he was bitter and angry over hearing the word “no.” Here’s a warning for us: The word “no” is not always a bad thing. If God says “no” we need to trust that He has a plan that’s end result will be for our good and His glory. Judas reminds us that you can be so close and still miss the mark. As a believer, it is our job to ensure that even those who we think have a relationship with Christ, are given space and grace to recognize their need for Him and we need to cheer them on in accepting Him as their Lord and Savior in their lives. The 12 disciples teach us that man will fail you, but Jesus never will. They teach us that God uses imperfect people for His perfect work. They teach us that who we choose to ally ourselves with will have a direct impact on what direction our lives will go in. Once again my friends, I implore you to choose wisely. Surround yourself with friends and allies who will cheer you on and encourage you to follow Christ all your days.
Hebrews 13:5b-7, “for he has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we can confidently say, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?’ Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith.”
Read: Luke 6:12-16
Consider: Can you think of any other examples in the Bible of good friendships and allies? What about not-so-good ones? Who or what made the difference?
Do: Who are some people in your church that you could make friends with?
Prayer: Write out a prayer and ask God to help you be a true friend and to find true friends.
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